Safe Haven
by xhopelessxwandererx
Summary: Edward has lost the most valuable thing to him; His Bella.. He doesn't know what happened to her, meaning he left her with Jacob last. Though he has some suspicion that it has to do with Jacob, he doesn't want to bother the hurt. So he plays as if he doesn't know, yet. But how does Edward react when Bella has lied to him, and she's not really dead?-In progress/lemons in new chaps.
1. Mourning Helplessly Prologue

**|Prologue|~**

Edward's perfect fingers rested on the warm feel of his running MacBook Pro. The room was pitch dark, no lights to see the outside world in front of his large window that had the view of the forest, the river that ran slow and smooth. He could hear almost everything, the sound of a deer moving in the forest. That exact river, hikers nearby. He could hear the thoughts of so many greedy people. His mind was corrupted by all of that unpleasant noise. He just wanted to shut off the world now. He wanted nothing more than someone who has left his life. His nose flared, and his eyes were darker than usual, a shadow of black underneath them. He didn't seem healthy at all. He sat back in his chair taking a deep breath – though he did not need it – through his nose; which flared. His fingers pulled off the keyboard, a sense of frustration in his face. He couldn't finish what was written on his word document lit up on the computer. He wasn't one to write on the computer either; he usually used his pen and his paper; writing sweet calligraphy that showed stories in each words. But he couldn't bring himself to do so.

_**Dear Bella, **_

He leaned forward toward the computer again, pursing his lips into a tight line. His hands resting on the keyboard again, before he pulled them off quickly and let them run through his bronze hair that fell on his face. "Damn it." He growled under his breath and sighed greatly before shutting the laptop and standing up. He couldn't bare the thought of thinking anymore, hearing, touching, feeling. He wanted to escape this cruel world. He just wanted to shut everything _off. _

He walked to his chase and sat down on it, leaning over and gripping his falling hairs again, a soft knock on the door had made him crane his neck to look over. "Leave me alone." He muttered.

"Edward." The soft chirpy voice spoke with hurt, just as much of Edward and the door cracked open, letting the small light from the hallway peer through his bedroom, just a slit before the small pixie walked in herself. Closing the door and making the slit of light disappear. It was darker in the room than before since his laptop was closed. No light, anywhere. She let out a breath and Edward could spot a frown from afar on his sisters lips. "Please, let's just ta—"

"No-, Alice. Can we please, not?" He layed down on the chase and let his hands rest on his rock hard stomach, closing his eyes gently.

"I hate seeing you like this.. I hate what this has done to you. God Edward you have been in your room for months now; I haven't seen you left since—"

"Alice.. Please." Edward murmured, the thought of what Alice was about to say, sadden him even more. Let alone he couldn't bare of thinking of _her. _

"I'm sorry." Alice still had the small frown on her face, and turned on her heel grabbing the handle of the knob. She didn't turn it yet, she just stood in front of the door. "Are you coming hunting tonight?" She knew the question was stupid, though he hadn't hunt in months. But she had hope, with the slightest of luck that he would say yes.

"No." He mumbled, and opened his eyes. "I'll be fine, Alice.. I'm fine." He reassured her though she didn't believe him, she thought it'd be best to leave him where he was. Let him relax. She twisted the knob on the door, the slit of light appearing again, showing barley Edward's face, but a good look at it was morbid and unpleasant. She shook her head and walked out of the room, shutting the door quietly and making her way down the stairs.

"It's no use, Alice." Jasper mumbled softly and brushed his lips on her temple. "It'll be okay."

"I don't know, Jazz." Alice looked up at him, with hurt in her black eyes. "I just don't know."

"None of us do.. It's best to leave him alone. He lost something too valuable to him. Who knows how long it'll take him." Carlisle said from afar. "We jut have to let it be."

"Let it be." Alice repeated the words, a meek smile creeping on her face. "Let it be.." She whispered under her breath.

The Cullen's left, leaving Edward behind as usual. He didn't move an inch from the spot he was in. Instead he let his mind take him elsewhere. Something he called his; _Safe Haven_. It wasn't a dream, it wasn't a day dream, a night dream, whatever the mortals called it. He could not sleep, thus it couldn't be any of those. It was simply his imagination taking his empty mind somewhere else.

_Bella, I miss you. _He heard playing in his mind over and over again. It made him narrow his eyebrows in pain. _Bella, I want you. _He thought again. These words wouldn't seem to creep away from his thoughts. It irked him. _Your lips, Your soft and warm hair, your warm skin upon mine. Your deep brown eyes, your everything. My world is cold without you. There are no shooting stars, no moonlight grazes, nothing. There is nothing in my world without you here. _

He sat up, his eyes panged open and he ran his fingers through his bronze hair again. Swinging his legs over the chase and standing up. He brought his hands behind his back and looked out into the moonlit forest. He leaned his head to the side a little, dare he go out into this world right now but the burning of his throat wasn't making his decision of staying any easier. He just wanted to be with _her. _

He opened the large window of his room, and jumped down gracefully hitting the soft grass beneath his loafers. He pushed his hair back away from his face again, the moonlight glistened on his marble pale skin as he began to run faster than the eye could see. He picked up speed quickly, making his way towards the treaty line. He couldn't believe what he was about to do.

As he stopped dead on at the Ravine, he watched the water rubble down the path it was lead too. His eyes averted to the moon that lit up the smooth sound of the water. It was the only thing pleasant. As he brought himself a step back, and made his way to a large leap over the Ravine, he could soon hear the pounces of the wolves paws matting in with the shape of the earth. He got them to come. All of them. Certainly he only wanted one to come. The one who loved Bella as much as he did. _Jacob._ When they chased after him, he leaped to the other side of the Ravine, watching them hangover him from the other side. He tried to spot the one he wanted, the large reddish one.

"Jacob." He muttered, the wolf watched with his dark brown eyes, and averted them towards the others to leave. Edward could hear each and every thought running through Jacob's head. Which was perfect, only one would have to speak up. That would be, Edward. But of course his voice was velvet and but a whisper, enough for Jacob to hear.

_What do you want, Cullen? _He thought the word, Cullen as if it were a curse.

"Have you seen her?" He stepped forward, before leaning down to the mossy ground and taking a seat. His one leg hung over the small cliff.

_You know I haven't. No one has, not even Charlie. _Jacob sat down, before fully laying down. Feeling somewhat safe. Edward had no strength to hurt him anyway.

Edward looked down and picked at the moss with his hands. He looked up at him.

Jacob despised doing this but he had too. _We are going to keep looking, Edward. We will find her. You know I wouldn't let myself from finding her just because it's been nearly six months since she's been gone. _

Edward simply nodded. He pursed his lips into a tight line. His face crumbled as if he was about to cry of his lost love one.

_Oh I know your stronger than that, don't cry. _Jacob brought his head up, his eyes glistening in the moonlight. _Come on, Bloodsucker. _

"It won't happen, Jacob. I can't cry."

Jacob let out a soft gruff, as if laughing and pleased with what he said. _No immortal soul can cry, gruesome right? _

For once it was as if they were civil with each other. The loss of Bella brought them closer.

"You don't think it was the gunshot do you? The one we heard late that night in the forest?"

_There are million of hunters out here in these woods. I'm sure nothing like that would of happened. Besides you walked her home didn't you? _

"I walked her to the treaty, you walked her half the way."

_Don't turn this on me.. _Jacob put his head down. _Don't make this my fault. _

"You didn't walk her the rest of the way?" Edward's jaw tensed, and he glared deep into the wolves eyes.

_I—_Jacob's thoughts stopped, and he stood up. _I should go. _

"Jacob." Edward growled quickly standing up.

_Get some meat on your bones, I don't want to start a fight and kill you too. _Jacob turned around and looked into the dark forest.

Edward peered at him, trying to read any guilt off his face. "Jacob, I need to know. Did you walk her home that night like I had asked? Like I trusted you for her."

_It's a long story. _And with that Jacob darted off into the forest, his paws that matted into the earth making such disruption with everything else in the forest, became softer and softer.

* * *

**Author's Note: **So what do you think of this? It took me a little while to come up with it. But I thought good and hard. I thought I might take a break from my other story and write something a little more innocent.

It was mostly in Edward's point of view, though I wrote in third person I guess you could see some sense. This story will mostly be in his point of view, but sometimes it will switch around to Jacob, or too Bella. Which by the way, I hope I left much of a cliff hanger for you guys to figure out what happened to her. ;) Mwuaha, I'm so evil.

Reviews are nice! I'd love to see some reviews so I know if I could move on with this story or not. I don't know how long exactly this story will get before I take it to a cut. Chapters will be uploaded soon!


	2. Reminder

**Author's Note: **Prepare for a really long chapter. Well for me at least. Haha. Yes, I am going to start using songs by Mumford & Sons in the beginning of chapters. They just fit so perfectly for me. If you have any songs that you think would fit for chapters, go ahead and review and request them I'd love to put them in! If you have any idea's on what should of happened to Bella, or any further Idea's after that, go ahead and let me know. I'd love to hear them as well.

I hope you enjoy this chapter. I don't own anything from Mumford & Sons, (Amazing band!) Stephanie Meyer's beautiful characters and story, and Sense & Sensibility the book.

Enjoy!

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"_Don't let me darken your door._

_It's not what I came here for, _

_No it's not what I came here for. _

_And I won't hear you cry when I'm gone. _

_I won't know if I'm doing you wrong. _

_I never know if I'm doing you wrong. _

_A constant reminder of where I might find her light, _

_That might give up the way. _

_Is all that I'm asking; for without her I'm lost and_

_My love won't fade away. _

_So watch the world tare us apart. _

_A stoic mind and a bleeding heart. _

_You'll never see my bleeding heart. _

_And your lights always shinning on_

_And I've been traveling oh, so long. _

_I've been traveling oh so long." _

_-Reminder; Mumford & Sons-_

Edward watched as Jacob ran off into the forest. His mind lost with what he had last heard from Jacob's thoughts. His fists clenched tightly, he had a rage of emotions that hurt him. He missed, _her._

And it could possibly be _Jacob's_ fault, and it also couldn't. But he didn't know, because Jacob left him with no answers. Just '_It's a long story_' As an explanation. Edward shook his head slightly, letting a sharp breath come from his chest, surpassing his pursed moist lips as it began to rain down, soaking his hair, which defied gravity and stayed nearly perfect. He turned on his heel swiftly and began to dart off into the forest; he was mostly blowing off the different emotions running through him right now. Anger. Loss. Hurt. Everything.

_You were supposed to walk her home; I left her at the treaty for you. This is your fault; this could be your fault that she is dead. And you don't even care. _Edward thought as he picked up speed in the forest with trees rushing past him. Everything had caught his vision; he couldn't seem to block out the world being out of his dark room. Once he reached the house, he jumped into the open window and landed perfectly into his room. He slammed it shut, only for the glass to make a thunderous sound and bounce against the air. He shut off the lights, even though the sun rising made it hard for him to escape it. He sat down on the king sized bed, running his hands along the comforter reminded by the fact that he had bought this for his – He couldn't even think of _her _name.

When he stood up and made it swiftly over to his chaise, he sat down on it and grabbed his journal, which he hasn't written in, in over centuries. He picked up the ordinary pen, not the feather one. His handwriting still came out perfectly, in that elegant calligraphy.

_Bella, I know this is stupid. Writing to you when you can't even see or read this. What am I doing? I guess since there is _

_A lot on my mind I figured I would write to you. _

_And maybe some day when we meet again, you would _

_Pick this up and read it, because I know you. _

_I know how you like to peer at the things in my room. _

_Take in everything I have, and remember it with your little human mind._

_I know how much you love that. Maybe you'd love this; this letter I write. I love you so much, and It's insufferable to think of you. I know that's hard for me to believe but it is. I can't nearly even speak your name. It hurts, it's dreadful. I want this to all end. Where did you go? _

_My world is cold without you. My nights are dark and black. I have no sunlight, no shooting star that dazzles me, grazes the sky so elegantly. Makes my world a little brighter. Nothing. I have nothing. I just want to take you in again one last time if I could. Pull you into a tight embrace. Feel your warm body against my rock stone ageless body and, your dark brown hair in my face ever so gently grazing off your wonderful human scent. I want to feel your soft lips intertwined with mine, I want to see your brown eyes again. How they beam every time they see mine. I feel like I am slowly becoming a monster without you here. You turned me around, made me believe I could possibly have a soul but now I am falling back into the centuries where I once was. I am becoming something I had once been, and I don't know if I could suffice the sacrifices I made back then, to do this all over again. _

_Please come home, Bella. Please find me, find this. I miss you. I love you. I … want you. _

_With all love, _

_Edward Anthony Masen Cullen_

Edward lifted his head from his journal shutting and wrapping the leather lace around the button before throwing it at the end of his chaise. He sighed and stood up, flashing towards his book shelf he grabbed one of Bella's old books that she enjoyed reading, and ran his fingers across the tabs she had left to her favorite pieces of the book. He opened the page and began to read a couple of the quotes that stood out to him.

"_Pathetic, to die for love? How could you say so? What could be more glorious?" _

"_He believes many people pretend to more admiration of the beauties of nature than they really feel, and is disgusted with such pretensions.__"_

"_My heart is, and always will be yours." _

Edward quaffed as he ran his fingers across the words, his face nearly crumbling to the fact that nearly all of the quotes corresponded with his life right now. He shut the book and shoved it into the shelf before swiftly turning on his heel to face something he thought he would never see.

"Bella…" He took a step forward; his golden eyes flickered as he watched what was standing in front of him.

"Hey." Bella smiled softly at him.

"Where have you been? What happened? What's going on? How could you not call me when you needed help. Do you know how worried I've been." He pulled her into a tight embrace only for her to crumble into his arms as he stepped back she was complete dust, completely gone. His hands trembled as he held them out before slowly dropping to his sides, he swiveled around and looked about his room for her. What had just happened? He raised an eyebrow and gnawed on his bottom lip before letting it go. "I could of sworn.." He mumbled softly, before rubbing his temples gently. "She.. She was there." He muttered.

"Edward?" His head shot up as he heard her voice again.

"Look whoever you are! Stop tricking me!" He pointed at _Bella_ standing up in front of him yet again.

"I won't hurt you, won't you trust me? Who I am? I thought you loved me."

"Of.. Of course I love you." He mumbled. "No.. No." He shook his head. "You're not real."

"Edward, calm down, what's wrong? Why are you shaking?" Bella was gone from him again, Alice had griped his arms tightly with her small pixie-like hands, watching Edward as he nearly flung her off.

"Stay away from me, You're not Bella."

"Of course, I'm not. I'm Alice, what's going on?"

"Stop! Stop!" He roared. "Leave! You don't know the shit I have been going through! You're not Bella!" Edward yelled nearly as loud as he could.

Alice stood there, her eyebrows knitted together in confusion and a frown fell on her face as she stepped closer slightly, watching Edward stumble back before completely falling. She let out a soft gasp. She couldn't tell what was happening, but it nearly pained her to see her brother the way he was. "Edward." She whispered.

Jasper, Esme, and Carlilse all had ran upstairs towards Edward's room, hearing the thunderous bang on the floor from Edward's previous fall. "Is everything alright?" Esme asked nearly worried and frowned at the sight of Edward running towards him, she helped him up.

"Edward, what's wrong?" She raised an eyebrow, Carlisle looked around the nearly shattered room and stepped in, Jasper stood by Alice's side now taking her into a full embracing and calming down her mood quickly, as he did for Edward as well.

The sudden feel of the mood swiftly changing in the room seemed inconceivable, Edward looked up at Jasper and then over at Esme who was now holding him tight.

"I saw, Bella." His velvet voice cracked on her name and he looked down at his hands that slowly began to tremble less and less. "She was here, with me.. She greeted me and everything." He shook his head, burring into his hands.

"Oh, Edward." Esme rubbed his back gently in small circles before sitting down with him.

Carlisle shifted and looked at Edward before looking over at Jasper and Alice.

"What's wrong?" Jasper asked in question.

"I think he might be having hallucinations." Carlisle said softly. "It has something to do with the mind. It seems nearly impossible considering he's dead." Carlisle sighed. "There could be a likelihood though that it's not impossible.." He looked back at Edward. "How long has this been happening?"

"I just—I just saw her now.. That's all, just now.." He mumbled softly looking up at his _father._

"Hmm." His hands rested crossed his chest. His eyebrows narrowed in concern as he looked at his son. "I'm sure it will, hopefully blow over. I couldn't figure out anything wrong with you yet. Perhaps it's too soon. But we will have to keep an eye out. Edward, I think you should hunt. You're looking very weak, that could possibly be some sort of cause of it. Just take a quick run. For the family, you know we are all worried about you. I know you will find her but we need you to help out too, if you need this help." He murmured. "Son, I think it's for the best."

All Edward had done was nodded, looking down at Esme silently thanking her, and Carlisle as well as he stood up swiftly and walked out of his bedroom door before quickly flashing away.

Edward darted through the forest yet again, this time making his way to the mountains in hope for some mountain lions. He knew he needed his strength and he needed something closest to a human's blood. He stopped once reaching the top, and peered over towards a lion gracefully laying about, and bathing itself. He stepped forward, just as the lion leaned up in an arched position ready to attack if it needed too. It was a warning, Edward knew very well enough but it didn't stop him.

The lion paused it's doings and stood up, sauntering over to the edge of the rock they were on, it turned back around to face Edward, a raspy growl escaping it's chest as Edward's dark eyes intensified into it's large brown eyes. He hunched in a fighting position, something he hadn't been in for a while. He darted towards the lion, gripping the neck, snapping it and seeping his teeth into the lion's neck. The blood quickly fulfilling his burning throat, and thirst. His pale and morbid looking face quickly became healthy again. His dark eyes faded into a amber color before becoming fully golden brown. He had stood up and shoved the lion off the mountain point watching it fall towards the forest ground. He sighed and jumped down as well before darting off back to the house.

* * *

**Author's Note: **This chapter isn't over yet; I just want to let you know. I will double line if it goes into another character's point of perspective. Usually it will be in Edward's but I wanted to give you a bit of Jacob. Maybe so you could get a realization of what's going on and be less confused. So enjoy!

* * *

Jacob ran fast in the forest quickly making his way back to his home as it began to rain. His paws stuck to the mud as well as his fur. He could hear the wolves chasing after him, wondering what had happened previous to Edward talking about Bella. He didn't stop for them, he didn't return any of their thoughts to them. He just ignored and continued running faster and faster in hopes they would get the hint to leave him alone. On his travel he thought back to the night he was sentenced to take Bella home. He pondered if it was actually his fault or not. If he did make a mistake on what he had done. It sent a pang of hurt through his chest to even think of her.

_Bella shoved Jacob playfully and giggled, her cheeks blushed apple red as she looked over to him, her dark brown eyes beamed in the moonlight. The forest lit up around them, and Jacob could smell everything and anything. _

"_What?" He chuckled as he nudged her back gently and she shook her head. "Tell me what is so funny." _

"_It's nothing really. Let's change topic." Her voice changed, it was a topic she wanted to bring up that no one wanted to hear, well out of the Vampires and Werewolves. I'm sure any human would be completely clueless aside of Bella. _

"_To what?" Jacob's voice was stern, they were making their way back to his house because she agreed to hang around with him for a bit, before heading home. It was after all only eight o clock on a Saturday night. _

"_About this whole … vampire thing." She shrugged. "I mean, about me, changing." She said softly and slow, hoping that Jacob wouldn't get too angry. _

_He looked over at her and sighed, his nose flared and mucles tensed before relaxing. "Bella," He whispered. "I—" He turned his head away from her looking out towards the forest. Bella had taken it as it hurt him and gnawed on her lip nervously before realizing he completely lost focus and gaze, he hadn't answered her for over a minute. Usually he would of said something by now. _

"_Jacob, I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't of brought it—" _

"_Sh." Was all he said, and continued to look out in the direction he was. Bella stiffened and looked in his direction, trying to figure out what was grabbing his attention. It nearly scared her a bit. He had turned around to face her and grabbed her quiet quickly in which it startled her racing off into the forest. _

"_Jacob, what's going on?" She panicked, nearly out of breath as they made it the other way. _

"_Bella." He stopped them, dragging her behind a tree. "I want you to run as fast as you can, ok? I am going to try and run them away from you." He mumbled. "You have to trust me." _

_Bella nodded, her cheeks flushed. She was nervous. How far could she run before completely falling on her face as usual, Could she make it at all, or was this going to end badly? "Jake.. Jacob, who is it?" She raised an eyebrow. _

"_Don't worry. Just run." He demanded before running off and shifting into a werewolf. She took a gasping breath and turned on her heel running deep into the forest. Jacob had lost her scent, her heartbeat after awhile. He continued running towards the running corpse ahead of him. Not minding that he couldn't hear her anymore. He just wanted to kill this thing that was planning on hurting her. He knew what it was, one of those black cloaked people with the red eyes. He just didn't know if he could suffice killing the thing._

Jacob ached too remember as he trotted towards his house, shifting completely back to a human. He couldn't bare to think that this could possibly be his fault. He didn't turn back to find her, he just ran off to kill the thing that distracted him. He thought to himself, as of now. Maybe that was the trick, that they would irritate him enough to chase them down and kill one of them, and now it's his fault and they are after Bella for revenge, or simply because she hasn't changed to the previous promise she agreed and arranged with the Cullen's. Where is she now? No one knows, unless it's where Jacob thought she was.

_Italy._

__**Author's Note: **So my lovely reviewers and followers, what did you think? Let me know! :)


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